Jim Lowery, my co-worker at BTAS, passed this implementation tale to me for you to enjoy!

Twas the Night Before Implementation, and all through the house,

not a program was working, not even a browse.

The programmers hung by their tubes in despair,

with hopes that a miracle soon would be there.

The users were nestled all snug in their beds,

while visions of enhancements danced in their heads.

When out of the elevator arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.

And what to my wandering eyes should appear

but a super programmer (with a six pack of beer).

her resume glowed with experience so rare,

she turned out great code with a bit pusher’s flair.

More rapid than engines, her programs they came,

and she whirled and shouted and called them by name:

"On Update! On Add! On Inquiry! On Delete!

On Batch Job! On Closing! On Functions Complete!"

her eyes were glazed over, fingers nimble and lean,

from weekends and nights spent in front of a screen.

A wink of her eye and a twist of her head

soon gave me to know that I had nothing to dread.

she spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,

turning specs into code, then turned with a jerk,

and laying her finger upon the "enter" key,

the system came up and worked perfectly.

The updates updated, the deletes they deleted,

the inquiries inquired and the closings completed.

she tested each program and tested each call,

with nary an UAE, all had gone well.

The system was finished, the tests were concluded,

the user’s last changes were even included.

And the user exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt,

"It's just what I asked for, BUT IT'S NOT WHAT I WANT!"